Dangerous Women – Simply Convivial

Repost from 2011. The exhortations I received at this conference last year was a large part of why I shifted the focus of this blog (and hopefully my own personal focus along with it) to the concept of “conviviality.”

Although my friend and would-be companion ended up unable to join me, and although I had to get up at 4:30am and leave just after 5am, I attended the Dangerous Women conference put on by the “Femina girls“: Nancy Wilson and daughters and daughter-in-law.

This was a pre-conference before the Grace Agenda conference, but I just went for the morning, lunch, and early afternoon, stuck around for the NSA Disputatio with Mark Driscoll, then headed home and was home before the kids’ bedtime.

And, since I didn’t drive with anyone, I had a whole 2 1/2 hours to think and pray about all the exhortations I’d just received. I think conversation might have been more pleasant. :) It was good.

So, I’ll share now the gist of my notes, which I hope will whet your appetite for the audio.

Nancy Wilson: Dangerous Women

All women are dangerous women. We are either building our house or tearing it down. You want to be dangerous to the enemy, not to your children. There is no neutral option.

  • You need to know who your people are (your people are God’s people), where you fit in the story, and make choices based on long-term perspective, not based on anxiety or fretfulness. You need grace and you need to be a woman of the Word.
  • The Bible teaches that women are prone to deception; deception is our weakness, where the enemy (our sin, the world, and the devil) is most likely to attack us. We need to be aware of the thoughts playing in our head. If a lie or foolish thought pops into our head, it is a temptation that we need to reject, not consider, not converse with, just ignore and walk away from — replace it with a true thought.
  • This is why we need to spend time in the Word — so we know the truth. A dangerous woman knows and believes God’s promises, and knows she can’t coast.
  • A dangerous woman has a strong sense of purpose, she’s paying attention and always reminding herself of the truth, she knows when she needs to hit the refresh button, to regroup and remember where she is and why she’s there.
  • She thinks long-term; she knows that God works patiently and He’s not in a big hurry, so she is not either.
  • She’s not afraid of work. She knows a clean house is not the victory line at the end of the day, it is only a means toward the end of loving her people and her God. The end is serving God and cheerfully and heartily doing the work He places in front of you.
  • She keeps her eyes open, she has a backbone, and she is not an easy target for unbelief and deception.
  • Dangerous women not only build, but beautify and glorify what they touch — the woman’s touch. We are a glory, and we glorify. We are about the business of transformation, in tangible, real, daily ways.
  • We love fruitfulness — not only children, but all abundance, taking something and making more of it, taking the fruit of the Spirit and manifesting it.

    Home is where the action is. The enemy works to destroy homes. The home is where culture is born and bred and kept. All work outside the home comes back home daily. The home is a weapon and defense, a refuge and oasis.

  • The table is the center of our home: who sits at our table? are people refreshed at our table? are souls as well as bodies fed? Remember that feeding is more than nutrition and bodily necessity; eating around a table is inherently symbolic. It is practice for heaven. Make it a priority.
  • The table is potent and it is how we will rebuild culture.
  • Do not be threatened by rude comments people make about you or your family. They make such comments because they are threatened by your family and by your joy (which can only come from Christ, it is a light that shines). Let them feel threatened; don’t feel threatened yourself. Your security is in Christ.
  • Protect yourself from deception. How the serpent attacked Eve warns us about how we might be tempted. He blew the restriction out of proportion and closed her eyes to her blessings, he changed the command into a question and entangled her in a conversation, he questioned God’s motives and lied to sow doubt (a question can find an answer, a doubt is “what if” or a questioning that doesn’t want to find the answer), he minimized the consequences of disobedience and made her think it wasn’t a big deal to disobey, he got Eve to act unilaterally without her husband’s authority, he displaces authority. Thus she became a traitor and ate at Satan’s table.
  • Pay attention to the thoughts in your head and flee temptation rather than debate with it. Keep your wits about you.
  • If you want to be blessed, you must obey. God will not bless disobedience. (We don’t earn that blessing, but God’s not going to bless us no matter what what we do). God gives us the means and the strength to obey; we need to be asking for His grace constantly.
  • God reclaimed Eve, put enmity between her and the serpent, and he’s reclaimed us. Know how to get back on your game (know how to repent and move on) when you fall — gaining wisdom all the while.

Dangerous Women Conference Summary

Keep these truths in mind with this free printable.

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  1. I really appreciate you reporting these notes, this is quite thought provoking. I particularly was struck by the first bullet point on this post – so true! I feel like I did a fair amount of tearing down in my family about a year ago (had a very difficult postpartum period) and I am still dealing with some the the long lingering bad fruit of that.

  2. I have several “tearing down” bad habits that I am always convicted of by these ladies. The good news is that God actually does the building, and uses our small, feeble efforts. But that conviction and the lingering bad fruit are the calls to repentance we must heed.

    Sincerely asking for forgiveness is how we can [how God does] turn our tearings down into building ups.

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